Browsing Tag

life

Daily

Happy Birthday, me.

“Don’t wish me happiness — I don’t expect to be happy; It’s gotten beyond that, somehow. Wish me courage and strength and a sense of humor — I will need them all.”

— Anne Morrow Lindbergh

It’s a lovely time right now in my life. I know better than to believe in fairytales and happy endings, in fairy godmothers and love at first sight and even (gasp) an exciting career path – but it sure feels like anything’s possible right now.

Too much expectation again, but let me just revel in the possibilities. I’m amazed at my life thus far; at how things seem to fall into place, and how things seem to fit snugly and comfortably leading to this moment, leading to the now.

I just need to believe. I need courage and bravery, and a sense of humour for the downtimes.

God help me. My future is looking pretty lovely right now and I don’t want to wake up.

May 8, 2012 by
Daily

Maybe one day

You know what would be perfect? Traveling around the world, going on roadtrips and concerts and doing it all with someone lovely for the rest of my life.

 

April 12, 2012 by
Daily

Hating music with a passion

Music goes much deeper than anything else. I once said that I have a love/hate relationship with it, and I truly believe it. There is a lot of grief in music, a lot of pain. There isn’t just one emotion in each song, good music confuses you. It brings so much depth and emotion with it, there’s usually a conflict within you as you listen to it play.

That internal struggle frustrates me. It makes me want to sing along, it makes me want to cry. But what do you do when you can’t hit the notes? What do you do when you can’t sing it out? It gets even more exasperating, the inner turmoil grows.

I am currently obsessed with Andrew Lloyd Webber’s The Phantom of the Opera at the Royal Albert Hall, and I’ve watched it almost six times now in three days on DVD. Yes, it is still playing now as I type this out. Ramin Karimloo has the most achingly beautiful voice and when he is acting as The Phantom, easily translates into an awe-inspiring mix of emotion. Just so much emotion, so much energy.

I hate it. I hate it because it is so gorgeous it makes me want to kill myself. Indeed I hate it because it’s so beautiful.

March 7, 2012 by
Daily

The Graduate

Feeling a lot like Dustin Hoffman in The Graduate, if he didn’t meet Mrs. Robinson. What I’m trying to say is that I’m a lost sheep, a drifter. I’m waiting for my life to begin, and there isn’t a specific moment where I’m going to know for sure that it has begun. There isn’t a starter to shoot off a pistol, telling me when I’m supposed to grow up, propelling me to move ahead into my life, to start on my career.

So yes, I’m a little bit hazy and a little bit sad.

February 16, 2012 by
Daily

Another year, an other me

Another year gone by, oh how time flies. I’ve been dreaming through the days with the help of some wise words from Alison Sudol. I’m in two minds about my impending unemployment, swooning over boundless opportunities and freedom, whilst secretly wishing that these lazy afternoons will never end. Being thrown from an academic bubble into a living, breathing society based on capitalism and incessant hunger for success? Exciting or scary? I’m still figuring that out.

January 2, 2012 by
Daily

2012, please be kind

2011 was the year that Death came to warn us. It was the year you fell ill, my strong pillar of support, my luckless keeper. Finding out about it felt surreal. Too dramatic, and too scary. I tried not to beg in my prayers, I made no bargains with God. I only prayed for it to disappear. You were strong even then. I felt alone in my misery and helplessness, but you fought bravely and never showed your pain. None of us could imagine life without you, and we will live in fear everyday of losing you.

2011 was also the year I lost my best friend. It was the year we realised our differences, and the year you finally walked out on me. I would eventually come to thank you, for everything you’ve ever done, but the sadness washes over me when I remember how things used to be, when I remember the plans and promises that never followed through.

2011 was the year that went by too fast. It was the year I graduated from university, although I hardly remember doing anything worth noting, and I hardly remember feeling anything but loneliness.

December 15, 2011 by
Daily

You’ll never be this way ever again

“You get a strange feeling when you’re about to leave a place, I told him, like you’ll not only miss the people you love but you’ll miss the person you are now at this time and this place, because you’ll never be this way ever again.”

— Azar Nafisi
Reading Lolita in Tehran

September 1, 2011 by
Daily

It’s the most beautiful adventure life gives us

Frohman, who was responsible for producing the debut of Peter Pan in both England and the U.S., as well as other productions of JM Barrie’s plays, famously declined a lifeboat seat when the RMS Lusitania was sunk by a German U-boat in the North Atlantic.Actress Rita Jolivet, who stood with Frohman, George Vernon and Captain Alick Scott at the end, recalled Frohman quoting Barrie’s greatest hit, Peter Pan:

“Why fear death? It is the most beautiful adventure that life gives us.”

On a common impulse, they all moved closer together and joined hands just before a great wave swept them all off the deck. Jolivet alone survived.

(Source: Wikipedia)

August 8, 2011 by
Writing

Newton’s cradle

Back and forth we go, like a steel magnetic ball
A click – we meet – and then one leaves
And alone, alone again.
A click – hello – and then goodbye
As always, alone again.

June 2, 2011 by